Monday, June 30, 2008

Musical Monday

Is it Monday yet? Here on the bottom side of the Earth, it has been Monday all day! I however, am waiting for the Blogger date stamp to catch up. I know most of you are holding out for this week’s Musical Monday, and who am I to withhold your pleasure.

In a little over one week, the cinema version of Mamma Mia will be released around the globe. As I am sure most of you are aware, Mamma Mia uses the music of Abba to set the story of a wedding and further paternal ponderings.

This combination of existing music to create a story is not a new idea. Music of popular recording artists has been used to create many shows including: “Dusty – The Musical” uses the music of Dusty Springfield to tell the story of Dusty Springfield; “We Will Rock You” uses the music of Queen to tell the story of Freddie Mercury; “Jersey Boys” uses the music of The Four Seasons to tell the story of, yep, you guessed it, The Four Seasons.

Are these shows truly musicals? If they were to be filmed for the big screen instead of set on the stage, would they be considered musicals or bio-pics?

This also brings up the question of recent stage adaptations of Dirty Dancing and Flashdance. These shows use the music from the movies, only instead of used as background music, they are sung by cast members. Do these two shows qualify as musicals?

Does that mean that any film we see where bands perform or a character sing a song qualifies as a Musical?

Meryl Streep and Shirley MacLaine sing a total of four songs in Postcards from the Edge… Is that a Musical?

At the end of First Wives Club, the Divine Miss M, Diane Keaton and Whatsherface all leave their event singing and dancing down the street. Does that make First Wives Club a Musical?

To be fair, Mamma Mia rightfully does fit into the musical category of “Revue” but where does it end?

How many more weak stories can be boxed together with immensely popular music, wrapped up and presented to us as cultured musical theatre? And we buy it!

Give me an original score any day.

What is a Musical?

My Life in Mosaic

Each one of the above photo graphs represent a question which was asked about me. I dare you to figure out the questions from the photographs.

Fabulous Friday... on Sunday

I can't think of anyone more fabulous than Sarah Brightman. She has has the voice of an angel and a wardrobe to match.

Today on Fabulous Friday, we will take a look at the many different faces of Sarah Brightman.

First we take a look at early Sarah Brightman, with a disco hit under her belt, she lived everyday as a sequined space explorer looking for love:

Once back on Earth, Sarah Brightman became the Sea Siren:

Then her fingers got all wrinkly from the water and she decided to become an Insect Spy:

After someone pulled the wings off of her fly suit, she developed into the Earth Mother:

When all the apples had been eaten off the tree, Sarah Brightman gained enlightenment and was crowned Lunar Goddess:

After years of bouncing around almost weightless on the moon, she needed to feel the earth between her toes and she morphed into the Queen of the Desert Harem:

After the sun bleached out Sarah's raven locks, she fled to the forest where she was worshipped as the Gothic Faerie Queen (ps - Don't you just love the dress?)

I cannot wait to see what visual delights the Symphony World Tour will hold... I only hope that it is not the same grande finale for the third tour in a row.

Friday, June 27, 2008

cupcake bakeshop by chockylit

Who doesn’t love sweet treats? This blog has fascinated me with her cupcake recipe trials. It blows my mind the most, that instead of using cupcake papers, she uses those little paper cups that they used in elementary school to serve fruit cocktail.

I dare you to go through the site and choose only one recipe that you want to try or at least dream of trying… one day.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Musical Monday

Patti LuPone as Mama Rose... Love her or hate her??? Tell me now.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Could You Be More Specific?

Checking my blog traffic statistics this morning, I stumbled upon a very odd and specific keyword. A keyword is what people type into their search engine when they are looking for information on the net.

This particular keyword was “Little House on the Prairie TV explanation Mary goes blind”

Dear visitor who was looking for the above information, I hope that this site was useful to you. However I feel it is my obligation and duty as a Little House Addict to provide you with the answer you seek.

Mary went blind as side-effect from scarlet fever.

After the blindness, there was an episode where Mary claimed that she could see light, but a trip to the doctor proved that she could NOT see the light, but was instead feeling the heat from the light source.

Come to think of it, Mary really had a tough life on that show. She was set to be the brilliant teacher, but then went blind, got trapped in a dust storm, her baby died in a house fire and sub sequentially she had a nervous breakdown.

She was also a racist. I hated Mary Ingalls.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Fabulous Friday.... Now 50% Off!

Fabulous Friday snuck up on me this week! I wake up on Monday and by the time I get to my offices, it is Friday… Seriously.

Yesterday I had the sudden inspiration to get a new pair of glasses, so I dragged my assistant out of the office and down onto the streets to hit all the eyeglasses shops. After trying on about 350,000 pairs of spectacles, I came to the decision I look good in absolutely anything that D&G produce.

The problem is: I am cheap. I am a fierce bitch, but I am also a cheap bastard.

I refuse to pay retail for anything. I was in absolute heaven after 9/11 when people stopped buying anything. Consumers first cut out any luxury or designer labels and shops such as Barney’s became desperate for customers. I found Dolce & Gabbana pants for 70% off, Gucci shoes for just under $55 and a beautiful cashmere sweater: $80.

I am no different when it comes to my eyeglasses. Eyeglasses are a double whammy as you first have to pay for the frames, then for the lenses. Even if you purchase the frames for half price, you still have to pay full price for the lenses. This does not make me happy.

Fortunately, right before my assistant and I left for the Great Glasses Search, one of my staffers gave me info about a website where you can order glasses at a discounted price and also get the lenses at a huge discount. I immediately asked this staffer to have my children.

So my assistant and I made the rounds to all the eyewear shops in the city entering each one like a tornado. Grabbing glasses, trying them on and inconspicuously writing down the model number and price so that when I get onto the website I can secretly have a thrill knowing exactly how much money I will be saving.

Is today’s Fabulous Friday about glasses? No! It is about saving over 50% on a medically necessary item. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Lenscrafters.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

It's Official... You've Voted Me "Lauren Bacall"

A while ago, I asked you which Legendary Lady of the Hollywood Screen I am most like. After many strenuous weeks of lobbying, campaigning, fund raising and television advertising, a whopping 45% of you declared me to be most like LAUREN BACALL.

This is a very proud moment for me, as obviously you feel that not only am I witty, intelligent and full of class, I also look damn good in a gown.

Let’s take a moment from our champagne guzzling to look at how the other candidates fared.

Jane Russell, who I feel that I share a lot of physical traits with (besides, you know, at least one very important trait) but not much life philosophy attributes, only received 11% of the vote.

There was a two way tie between Joan Crawford and Mae West (a fact I am sure Joan would not have been happy about), both receiving 22%. Joan Crawford was what now may be described as an OCD clean freak. Mae West, an OCD sex freak with brilliant one liners. Obviously 44% of you think I like to have sex whilst wearing rubber gloves (and 44% of you may not exactly be wrong).

The most shocking was that no one, absolutely ZERO, ZILCH, NADA, of you thought I was even remotely similar to Elizabeth Taylor. I am undecided as if to be offended or relieved about that.

The next big vote will be which Legendary Man of the Silver Screen I am most like. I do not want to sway the voting, but please vote for Rock Hudson.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Musical Monday

Today on Musical Monday: Living legend and musical queen Angela Lansbury… as stolen from Wikipedia.

Born on October 16, 1925 Angela Lansbury is an English actress highly noted for her work in theatre, cinema and television and widely respected for her versatility. To date, she has won four Tony Awards, six Golden Globes, nominated three times for the Oscar and 18 times for an Emmy Award.

Like a lot of folks out there, I grew up on the wholesome Angela Lansbury. You know Bedknobs & Broomsticks, Murder, She Wrote etc. So it was total mind blowing shock to me when I first saw a broadcast of her starring in dark and sinister Sweeney Todd; The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (for which she won a Tony).

I have loved her ever since.

What else does Angela Lansbury have to do to win a gay boy’s heart? Only originate the role of Mame in Jerry Herman’s musical adaptation of the same name (for which she also won a Tony) and co-star with Bea Arthur.

Oh yeah, and also star as Mama Rose in the first Broadway revival of Gypsy (for which she also won a Tony… you sense a theme here?).

Despite all of the above, do you know what moment sticks in my mind?

Ms Lansbury did a TV movie called, Mrs. ‘Arris Goes to Paris. In that film (which wasn’t a musical) Mrs Harris saves her money and goes to Paris to buy a Dior gown… couture of course. But obstacles stand in her way, mostly with a horrible man at the design house.

At one point in the movie, the horrible man says something horrible to Mrs Harris and she walks out to a park bench and sits there. In that moment, in her eyes, you can see her shattered dream, life’s pain, embarrassment, hurt and frustration. That is the moment which always sticks in my mind.

Well, that and Ms Lansbury riding a bicycle through Cabot Cove.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Julia Child Making Omelette

Watch and learn.

Fabulous Friday... On Monday!

Today’s Fabulous Friday topic is… Omelettes!!

Omelettes are a versatile anytime food and have limitless varieties, but Ok, Ok, omelettes are not terribly fabulous.

Who here learned how to make an omelette in school? It was complicated! You had to let the egg set in the pan, then lift to let the raw egg fall underneath so that it may cook. Then when it was all done, you had to somehow fold it over without breaking it and flip it onto a plate.

Let’s not even mention the water or milk debate.

I had completely given up on the omelette ages ago, until last year when I vacationed at a nameless tropical resort and every morning was given an omelette made to order. These cooks used the same techniques I used in school, only they made it look so simple.

Once I got back home I rushed out and bought the best omelette pan I could find, and set off ready to make mass orders of omelettes. In my mind, just by watching these cooks for 10 days, combined with a faded memory of middle school home ec, was all the practice I needed.

I arranged a Sunday brunch for seven people, which included croissants, jam, sausages, bacon, has browns, freshly squeezed orange juice and the piece de la resistance… made to order omelettes, cooked by moi!

In my mind, I was prepared. I was Martha Stewart, I believed that all the ingredients were fresh, perfectly prepared and, best of all, everything came perfect.

My bubble quickly burst when the first omelette ended being more like omelette flavoured scrambled eggs. No worries, the first one is always the test round.

Well, normally the first round is the test round, in this case rounds 1 - 6 were also test rounds. Each one coming out broken, burnt, raw, over cooked or scrambled.

By round 7, I had finally somewhat perfected the art of omelette making.. Or at least the art of making the omelette resemble an actual omelette. Thank goodness the last one was for me.

After that traumatic brunch, I put away the pan and apron and retired from omelette making.

Last week, I came across a clip of Julia Child teaching us how to properly make an omelette. She used techniques I had never seen before and it was all over in less than 30 seconds… wait, are we still talking about omelettes?

Julia Child revolutionised omelette making to me! She has reinspired me to not give up on the omelette and in return, for the past week, I have not been able to stop making omelettes!

A new world has opened up to me, and that is Fabulous.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Muscial Monday (18/50)

Thursday is late night shopping here in the semi-great metropolis on the western half of the sunburnt country. This means that the shops are open until the un-godly hour of 9:00pm instead of the normal 5:30pm. What this means for most of this fair city’s citizens is the only chance to do some serious shopping. For me, this means a sneak into my favourite DVD store.

This DVD store, in the outer working class suburbs, never fails to be fully stocked on musicals and Hollywood classics (a task most DVD stores in the gayer than gay inner city fail to achieve).

This last outing proved an especially good journey for me as I found some long sought after Judy Garland musicals, as well as the movie version of Hair, and the Tim Burton version of Sweeney Todd, the Demon Barber of Fleet Street.

I once saw the PBS recording of Sweeney Todd with Angela Lansbury and a community theatre production. I love this musical; I love its dark quirkiness and stunning melodies, particularly “Joanna” and “Not While I’m Around”. Plus I love any musical that can combine brutal murders and somehow flawlessly works in the word ‘shit’ into at least one of its songs.

I try very hard to write reviews of movies, but they always turn out to read more like a synopsis. So I will give you my opinions in fast, efficient bulletpoints:

Ø Johnny Depp’s vocal are surprising
Ø I can’t understand anything Helena Bonham Carter says (never could and I doubt I ever will.
Ø Visually stunning
Ø Very moody (in a good way)
Ø Quick to set the scene, but slow to get to point.
Ø Made me want to learn how to make traditional meat pies minus the cock roaches and you know, human body parts.

Was this the lamest post ever? I sincerely apologise.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Honey, You'll Hurt Yourself!


Fabulous Friday!!!!

As promised, today is FABULOUS FRIDAY. Dedicated to all things fabulous, and by ‘fabulous’, I mean things that I love.

First up is this clip from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. Which due to my incredible lack of blogging technologically efficiency, will appear in the post above this one.

Also, please note, that it IS in fact, already Friday in Australia.

What The...?

Query Number 2:

Why is it, that when I don’t have my credit card, I find super cheap flights, but three hours later, when I do have my credit card, the prices have doubled?

Thursday, June 5, 2008

In-The-Red Roof Inn

I am busy here at work trying to reserve internal US flights, cars and hotels. All of this leaves me with one very important query.

Is it possible to rent a hotel room in Chicago for LESS than $3 million a night? Including taxes?

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Wxxxxxxx Wednesdays! (18/50)

Up to this point, my writing on this blog has been whatever random thought has come into my head. I have relied on my totally unreliable motivation to keep it going on a regular basis.

I am not a person who likes to live within strict structure; however I believe that I need to add structure to my blog for millions of reasons, one being that structure may be the bran needed to keep Hula Hank regular.

To keep it fun and within the boundaries of my interests, I have decided on the following topics:

Musical Monday – On this day I will share with you some of my favourite musicals, or favourite parts from musical, whether on stage or on film. This may include a video or a story or both.

Fabulous Friday – Fridays should be fun, so on Fabulous Friday I will write up a little post of people, places or things that I find fabulous.

I am very excited about these two special days, however I feel that there needs to be something special in the middle of the week. Wednesday (also known as Humpday), is a day when we need a little inspiration to make it through the rest of the week.

I cannot settle on a name for Wednesdays, so far, I have 1) Washed-up Wednesday, 2.) Wax lyrical Wednesday and 3.) Whatever Wednesday.

Dear loyal reader(s?), I appreciate that I have only ever in the history of this blog received a total of two comments, but I need you now more than ever. What I am strongly suggesting is that you give me word starting with “W” that goes well followed by “Wednesday”.

Once I have compiled enough W words, we will take it to vote!

Ready. Steady. Go!

The Results Are In! (17/50)

There are major control freaks who read my blog. I couldn't be more proud.
A whopping 0% of you said that you were NOT control freaks. 33% of you said that you are control freaks, but refuse to admit it. 67% just came out with the truth and said, "Yes, I am a control freak."
I have now closed down this poll and removed it from the site. If you want proof of the numbers, then e-mail me at Note the ".au"

coming out in mid-life in red state america (16/50)

Next on the Blogroll is “Coming Out in Mid-Life in Red State America”, which is a terrible mouthful to say, I have looked on this blog only a few short minutes ago and noticed that it has been shortened to just “Coming Out in Mid-Life”

I stumbled upon this blog when I was trying to find out back stories about men (or women) who came out after getting married and having families. To be completely honest, I don’t check this blog as often as I used to mainly because it is a little heavy on American politics for me.

No longer living in the US, I like to keep abreast of the political happenings, but not in depth. That said, the writer of “Coming Out in Mid-Life” has a heart of gold, along with some great stories. You have to love a person who was once an influential Republican but has now seen the light!

Mean to Me

The late great Nell Carter singing her signature song "Mean to Me".

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

"What's a 'cliche'?" "A black woman serving pancakes to a white kid" (15/50).

I was fairly young when Gimme a Break was on TV, but I was glued to Nell Carter’s directness and what some would call, sassy love towards her family. I lived and died for each time she sang a song on the show. I was drawn to her, but had no idea why (well, you know, besides the fact that even at the age of 10 I was theatre fag in the making).

What I also didn’t know at the time was that the role of Effie White in the musical “Dreamgirls” was originally written for Nell Carter.

I also didn’t know that she won a Tony for her role in “Ain’t Misbehavin’”

I also didn’t know that it was Nell Carter who performed the song “White Boys” in the movie version of Hair.

I also didn’t know that, during a visit to New York 15 or so years later I would go to Feinstein’s and watch Nell Carter perform and affect me in a way that no other performer ever has.

In that intimate cabaret, she made me feel safe and connected and special. None of which I had felt for most of my life.

I wanted to write her a letter to thank her for a moving performance, but I also didn’t know that Nell Carter would die before I ever put pen to paper.

i am bossy (14/50)

First up on my Blogroll is Bossy. Although technically, I believe it is ‘I am Bossy’, so Bossy’s blog should really be somewhere in the middle of my blogroll.

I came across Bossy via Someone in a Tree (who I came across via Joe. My. God. …who I came across by magic). I entered somewhere towards the end of Bossy’s Excellent Road Trip, during which Bossy drove around the US meeting all of her fellow blogging friends. I was immediately jealous. Not of the road trip, but that Bossy had so many friends.

How could Bossy NOT have so many friends? She is funny, intelligent, witty and creative. She somehow has the time for family, dog, photography, a bumper sticker business and still manages to make several posts in one day.

I also think she is a total genius for her “Guess and Press”.

Here She Is,World! Here's Rose! (13/50)

Oh man! Has it has been ages since I have written a post. My full concentration has been directed to promotional events which had to be arranged these past two weeks.

I have already gone through my entire waiting list of pre-written posts (used only in case of emergencies of lazy writing days) so to get things rolling again, I will regularly go through my blogroll and tell you about each blog and why I am obsessed with reading them.

Let’s get things started.